Tuesday, December 29, 2009

This seat is taken


Last year, my big brother thought of having a Kris Kringle in the compound plus the Fernandez family (my sis-in-law's fam) for Christmas dinner which turned out to be one happy family gathering and one of the best Christmas celebs ever. Back then, daddy was still around to celebrate with us. Little did we know that it would be his last Christmas with the family, physically that is.

In my previous blog, I have particularly mentioned dreading for Christmas to come because I would not know how to face the day knowing that it's not going to be like the Christmases I was used to. But somehow, when the day came, i realized it wasn't so bad after all.

On the 24th, I woke up early to fetch D from work because we had to deliver gifts. First stop was the flower shop. I had to buy dad a present from all of us. Then went on to his resting place to give him the present. I still could not believe he is spending Christmas in there (or up there) and here I am, giving him flowers and lighting candles, the only present I could give him. My heart ached at the thought of it and at that moment, more than any other time I wish I could hand over my gift to him in person so I could plant a kiss on his cheek and hear him say "thank you" with his oh-so modulated voice. But that didn't happen and from now on, I know it never will. I left his resting place with a heavy heart and had to satisfy myself with the thought that, DADDY was the first person I spent Christmas with.

Days prior I had dreamt of DAD for the first time since he left. In my dream we were all gathered together (in a place i can't particularly remember) and all of a sudden DADDY began singing along with the Christmas Song playing in the background. Ate Lida told me that it simply meant DAD wanted us to be happy on Christmas day.

And so we proceeded with our Christmas dinner/party at big brother's house which again turned out to be one fun evening for everyone. We had Christmas head gears, games, prizes and food (ofcourse). And to keep the memories of a good night, we all had our pix taken. One particular picture caught my attention after browsing over the uploads in facebook. It's the one posted above. That's us five siblings (Kuya Boyette a.k.a big Brother, Ate Lizzie a.k.a Dyosa of the Night, Nolan a.k.a. The good Son, Minnie (mouse) a.k.a Bright Girl and Moi a.ka. The Favorite (hehe) with MOM. This is the first family picture (sans DADDY) after dad left. Funny I noticed an empty chair right beside MOM with KIFI (daddy's fave dog) sneaking from behind. We didn't notice the empty chair when it was taken, we only saw it last night. It's as if the chair is reserved for someone.. DADDY, ofcourse!

I believe that it is DADDY's way to telling us that we should be happy this Christmas and in the coming years because even if he is not with us physically, he is celebrating with us spirit. And so, we shall continue to save you a seat, DAD.

Merry Christmas! I miss and love you.

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